Ever notice how it's the little things in life that amuse us so much? More to the point, ever notice how it's the silly little idiocies in life that amuse us more than anything else? Well, this is not as much ''the little blog that could'' as it is ''the blog that enjoys going up the down escalator in your local mall.'' Will it have anything of real importance? No, probably not. But enjoy the ride never the less!

 


"It's the moooooooost wonderful tiiiiiiime of the year," or so the incessant Christmas carols playing in the mall have been saying for the last month and a half. I can't object too much with them, though: not only did I spend very little time out in the mall listening to said incessant carols (Mel, however, is ready to pound into bloody oblivion the first poor idiot who dares to so much as whistle "Santa Baby", and I can't say I blame her. It is a really tacky song.), but the overall carol playlist the mall had going this year was a lot better than last year's.

Granted, it's like asking which level of Dante-esque hell you'd rather spend eternity suffering in, but meh, we'll take it.

So Christmas has come and is going, going, soon to be gone. (Ironically enough, it's only on Boxing Day that we're supposed to get snow.) And I for one am pleased with this fact. Certainly, I've spent the last 3 years shuffling about and Bah-Humbugging the season, but that's more a retail hatred than anything, I've come to believe. Give me a Christmas where I don't work in the service industry, and I'll probably turn into the very customer I'd have creamed with a Customer Appreciation Amazing Pancake Maker on the spot this time around. Well, a cheerful customer anyways. I rather hope I don't get annoying, since I've had to spend enough time on the other side of the proverbial trench to appreciate the crap they do have to endure on a day to day basis.

But I'm digressing.

And digesting too. Hey, instead of a dinner, we had a late family lunch, and damned if that big-assed ball of deli turkey meat wasn't tasty! That cranberry jelly-blob, on the other hand, can stay far far away from me. Never liked it as a child, and it's now more than safe to say I still don't like it now.

But yes indeed, family gatherings were had. Gary spent the weekend discovering just what happens when you take 100+ pencil boards and more than a few wall scrolls, and eliminate almost every inch of wallspace in a guest room. But we had shelves of manga for him to read, so all was well. (Many visitors to the guest room get rather creeped out by the oodles of eyes all over the place. Heh, I love that word: oodles. Not quite as good as pyjamallama, but we're working on it.)

Due to unpleasant employee situations (and by that, I mean for the poor employee and not for me--bad things really do come in threes, it appears), I was sadly required to spend Commercialmas Eve at the kiosk. Which wasn't all that bad, if you don't count the tired state I was in by the end of it all.

And if you'll permit me to rant, but why is it that when the banks are going to be closed for 2 consecutive shopping days, they still seem surprised at how much all the stores around them desperately stock up on extra bills & coin rolls. It wasn't even 1pm on Saturday, and both banks in the mall had run completely out of rolls of pennies. And quarters. And loonies. And twonies. And dimes too, I think. And they seemed vastly perplexed by this.

Blind luck that Mel managed to get the last roll of twonies from one bank, and I finagled the last couple rolls of pennies from the other one. But that still leaves us precariously drained of most everything in terms of coinage. And this does not bode well for Boxing Day--a day which, traditionally, sees shoppers running around with $20 and $50 bills they got as gifts and want to break. Considering how everyone was paying in twenties and fifties Sunday as it was, I'll be astounded if we're not left with anything but those bills by the end of Tuesday. Ack.

Anyhoo, back to more pleasant things. Like swag. I heart swag. And as the title ever so subtly implies, I also heart Katamari. This was the year that I adpoted Mel's policy of starting to shop early for gifts. Like June/July early. And it paid off too, especially since I was able to purchase a few unexpected delights that made Mel's face light up when she opened them.

(And no, it wasn't because the flamethrower accidentally went off when she popped open the lid. Those things have safety catches for a reason.)

The seasonal swag has come to include sparkly bits, Fanshirts, Katamari balls, Fraggles, dog demons, waffles and far more Pepsi consumed in a single day than recommended. All in all, I am very please and very stuffed, and am being requested by my puppy that could I please remove my butt from the chair and let her run outside to pee, because it's been a very long afternoon and she can only hold it in for so long before she is forced to do very unsightly things to the carpet.

Merry Commercialmas to all, and to all...may you be able to sleep in Boxing Day. If I can't do it myself, then dammit I'm going to live vicariously through as many of you as I can!

Ja.


Today's Lesson: it's a bad thing when Friday's little bit of nowhere has to be called off on account of the bathroom ceiling suddenly losing all bladder control. (But on the plus side, we may get a whole new, refurbished bathroom as a result of someones--emphasis on the plural--from the wild, drunken party upstairs failing to notice their own toilet was clogged and overflowing.)
posted by Phillip at 3:51 PM